Locally dorky

Picture by:Devki Prabhu ( https://instagram.com/shutterinked?igshid=10aui8t3jwlzb ) A fire can be a lot of things, It can be someone’s agony and pain. It can be the destruction that burns down buildings. It can be anger that ignites feuds. But in some rare instances,  It can be the warmth that seeps deep within our being. And that is what it did that moonlit night,  Under the stars with wood and kerosene,  Like our hearts, burning bright,  Music that made our souls sway, And never ending chatter Accompanied with delicacies  Like shared memories on a platter, Spicy, bitter, salty and sweet.  That is the night I want to eternalise; For while every moment has a little something missing, On that one night on the terrace with my confidantes, Despite all tornadoes in our respective lives,  The fire acted like a catalyst of benignity; And you know how in certain moments you love a little more?  That is what that moment did, It made us feel whole like we’ve never been. 

I walk into the field of roses With a smile that never falters; Thorns pierce my feet Yet you’ll never see my face alter.  As I walk deeper,  I am surrounded by death eaters, And they keep sucking at my soul now and then But I don’t let them feed off my shine. My glow keeps flickering But it never completely disappears. Then I notice I am walking on thin ice, It cracks, but I tread along without fears.  When, despite smiling through the suffering, Into the ice cold water I keep sinking, I realise I amn’t after all brave, But afraid to face the pain. So, for the first time in ages I let go And let my emotions take control.  I wave the white flag and I surrender to the ache, Let the tears flow, all over my face.  I wait for someone to pull me out, Patiently embracing insecurities that sprout; As I understand it’s okay to not be okay, I feel I can finally breathe, maybe even float over after my time. 

Yesterday I jumped in the well. Did the grapevine get you the news?  I saw unknown faces trying to help and drag me out, But I swear I didn’t see you there. I remember telling you I was hurt  Expressing my plight inside the black hole that kept sucking me up,  And you just kept mum, you left me to reel, You didn’t seem to be concerned then, nor are you yet.  I want to share with you my ocean of tears and happiness  But all we can get to is two feet water, shallow and dense.  And yet every-time I try confiding in you,  You keep telling me you’re there without trying hence.  You hold my hand and drag me to the deepest of forests And I feel we’re stuck there but together; However, you always seem to know the way out  And I keep going deeper, stranded, searching and waiting your return. With you my life is a time turner, We’re stuck in an infinite loop of beginnings, You apathy doesn’t let us reach the end, And I wonder if you’re generally indifferent or this is directed towards my being.